"Look at you...You look so pretty in that dress"

When you meet a little girl, say a 5 year old, of a friend for the first time, you look at her long hair, big eyes and the pretty dress she's wearing and you squeal " You are so cute, you look so pretty in that princess gown."....Right? We all do that. Little girls are always so cute. It's hard to restrain ourselves from our first impulse which is to tell them how cute/ pretty/ beautiful they are. It's our culture's standard talking to a little girl. Giving her a compliment right in the beginning would boost up her self esteem.

But that's something that has started to worry me. A lot of girls under 12, I see often, wear makeup regularly, they would rather win America's Next Top Model, than aim for a Noble prize. Girls want to look hot (Honestly, I hate to call a girl hot), than smart. Cosmetic surgery is up on rise and so many teenagers are opting for cosmetic procedures to enhance their appearance. Looking all this, breaks my heart.
Praising girls for their appearance and that, it is the first thing you notice makes them feel that looks are more important than anything else. And they think, they have to look good all the time, which is quite not possible. So what are we missing here? A meaningful life being valued for our thoughts and accomplishments.

Don't you think, we should change the way we talk to girls? Instead of remarking her looks, why not remark on her insights, or strengths or smarts? I believe that would boost her self pride to a much larger extent. Next time, when I will meet a little girl, I will try not to compliment her looks first, but use the sentences like these....

"Nice to meet you, XXX"
"What are you reading these days, I love books, Do you?"
"What's your favorite book"
"Do you love Art?, What have you been drawing"
"What do you like or dislike"

I will try to oppose the culture that sends wrong messages to our girls and would try to value her brain more. I know that will not change our beauty industry, movie and shows that degrade women or our celebrity obsessed culture. But I will try to change a girl's perspective even if its for a few moments. I will try to generate a conversation that respects her brain and not her beauty....
I will try to change the way we talk to girls....